Tag Archives: BDSM

My Big Kinky Erotica Post, Part Three

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I’ve been having so much fun writing these erotica posts that I decided to go for another round!  I’ve got some great books for you to check out, some old and some new.  I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I did.

The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by Anne Rice (1983)

The original naughty trilogy!  These infamous books were published back in the 80s, but the popularity of you-know-what has led the publisher to reprint them.  Now almost thirty years after their first run, they’re being enjoyed by a new generation of readers…and Anne Rice is getting lots more royalty checks.

Claiming is the first installment in Rice’s Sleeping Beauty trilogy.  Written under the pseudonym A.N. Roquelaure, the books put an erotic spin on the classic story of Sleeping Beauty.  Read: forget Disney.  At the beginning of the first book, the Prince awakens Beauty from her hundred-year sleep by taking her virginity.  He then tells her that she belongs to him, that she is to address him as “my Prince,” and that he intends to bring her back to his castle as his sex slave.

Beauty is then brought in bondage to the Prince’s kingdom, where she is routinely beaten, displayed nude, and otherwise abused for the pleasure of the Prince and his mother the Queen.  Upon arrival, Beauty discovers that she is only one of dozens of princes and princesses who were sent as tributes to the kingdom to be trained as sex slaves for a period of five years.  Though as first Beauty is repulsed and shamed by the way she is treated, she grows to love her captors and becomes desperate to please them.

This book is very heavy in BDSM (think more hardcore than Fifty Shades) and features both male and female dominance.  Some acts might be too disturbing for certain readers, so be warned.  Still, I enjoyed this book for its beautiful language and lush setting.  Plus fairy tales traditionally contain some pretty heavy themes, especially the Sleeping Beauty story, which has been shown to contain several erotic elements.  So, it was interesting to read a purely adult take on a story that is nowadays considered to be for children.

Overall, the story is a little slow, but not boring.  Not all of the sex acts were to my taste, and the sex was over the top at times, but that didn’t stop me from enjoying the book.  It’s hot, it’s well written, and it’ll definitely change the way you look at fairy tales.

***

The Angel (The Original Sinners) by Tiffany Reisz (September 2012)

Nora Sutherlin is back in this follow-up to The Siren, which was released this past July.  And while I liked the first book, I enjoyed this sequel so much more!  This book throws a lot more twists and turns into the story, and fleshes out the main characters.

About a year after the events of the first book, erotica author Nora is still with longtime lover Søren.  While their D/s relationship is stronger than ever, Søren is now facing a turning point in his career which has prompted an investigation into his past.  Not wanting to risk exposing his secret life as a sexual dominant, he sends Nora away to stay with a friend for the summer.  Enter Suzanne Kanter, the tough journalist who is investigating Søren.  If she uncovers the truth, will she be able to deal with it?

As I said, The Siren is good but I loved The Angel.  Søren has a bigger part in this book, and a lot of time is put into explaining his backstory.  The more I learn about him, the more intrigued I am by him.  There is also more about Nora’s past in this story, which made me like and understand her more than I did in the first book.  I wasn’t sure I quite got her when I read The Siren, but there’s more to her than I originally thought.  Michael, who was briefly introduced in the first book, is now a main character, and I hope to see more of him in the next book.  Zach and Wesley, who were protagonists in the first book, are not featured as much.  Being as I wasn’t too crazy about them to begin with, that was ok with me.  But who knows, maybe I will be surprised by them the way I was surprised by Nora and Michael.

I’m really enjoying Tiffany Reisz’s Original Sinners series, and I enjoy them more than the Fifty Shades trilogy.  The sex is definitely harder, and the story is better.  Reisz has actual first-hand knowledge of the BDSM lifestyle, and these books definitely have more realism and much better writing than Fifty Shades.  It’s the most realistic and dynamic set of characters I’ve even encountered in a romance/erotica book. Plus Søren is just wicked hot, and after reading The Angel he just became hotter than Christian Grey in my opinion. Definitely going to read the next installment in the series, The Prince!

***

If I Were You by Lisa Renee Jones (August 2012)

It calls itself a mix of Fifty Shades and Basic Instinct, but for me it’s Fifty Shades-lite.  The first in a new trilogy (I’m starting to see a pattern here), this romantic thriller is about a woman trying to find out what happened to a girl who disappeared.

Sara is a teacher, living a simple life with her roommate in San Francisco.  When her roommate purchases some items at a storage auction, Sara discovers a series of journals belonging to a woman named Rebecca.  Sara reads the journals, and quickly becomes enthralled in Rebecca’s life, including her dangerous, highly sexual relationship with a mysterious man.  But what happened to Rebecca, and why would she just leave her journals in a storage locker and then abandon it?

Sara begins uncovering clues about Rebecca’s life, and even lands a summer job at the prestigious art gallery where Rebecca worked before her disappearance.  She works hard to prove herself to the fastidious but seductive gallery owner Mark, while at the same time she finds herself attracted to the quirky but wealthy artist Chris Merit.

The story is decent but familiar, and the characters are okay but nothing special.  At least not yet; there are still two other books in the trilogy.  The sex is fun, but there isn’t much of it until the second half of the book.  I’d recommend this one for people looking for more story than sex.  Of course Mark is the most interesting character because we know the least about him.  I might check out the sequel and see what happens with him!

***

Lip Service by M.J. Rose (2000)

Here’s one that’s also light on the sex but with a great story!  It’s thirteen years old but is enjoying a resurgence in popularity thanks to the recent erotica explosion (pun intended).

Julia Sterling is fortunate enough to live a life of privilege; she lives in Manhattan with her psychiatrist husband and adoring stepson.  But for Julia, her enviable life comes with a price: her seemingly perfect marriage is devoid of passion.  Her husband treats her like a child instead of a wife, and denies her need for intimacy while trying to coax her into taking antidepressants she doesn’t think she needs.  She smiles at parties and makes nice with the right people, but inside she is lonely.

Then a friend asks her to write a book about his work; he runs a clinic specializing in sexual disorders.  Julia quickly becomes fascinated with the clinic’s most unorthodox method of treatment: phone sex.  To research the book, and to fulfill her own hidden desires, Julia becomes a phone sex operator at the clinic.

For Julia, working at the clinic is scary, thrilling, and therapeutic at the same time. It gives her the insight to see her marriage for what it really is, and the confidence to see herself as a capable and independent person. But as with many things, there’s more to Julia’s secret profession than she thought, and more secrets at the clinic than her friend lets on.

This is a great story with a touch of eroticism and well drawn-out characters. If you’re looking for a book that’s a little daring but not too sexually explicit (well, compared to these other books at least), I would recommend Lip Service.

My Big Kinky Erotica Post, Part Two

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I hope you enjoyed my previous post on erotic classics from decades past.  But if you enjoy modern erotica more than the older stuff, give these titles a look!

Bared to You by Sylvia Day (June 2012)

There’s a lot of buzz about this book, and it seems to be at the top of a lot of summer to-read lists.  Some dismiss it as just a Fifty Shades copycat, while others say it’s better and even hotter.  The first in a new erotica trilogy (of course), Bared to You is the story of a young woman’s relationship with a possessive but emotionally distant millionaire.

Okay, so it’s pretty much exactly like Fifty Shades.  Come on, even the cover art is similar!  The only major differences between the two are the settings (Bared is set in New York) and the personality of the female protagonist.  Unlike the virginal Ana in Fifty Shades, Eva is just as emotionally damaged as her lover Gideon.  She was sexually abused as a child, and this makes it difficult for her to trust men, especially men like Gideon, who is hiding secrets of his own.

The sex scenes are a lot of fun and main characters are passable, but the story doesn’t really go anywhere other than “I like him but I’m not sure he’s right for me.”  Plus it’s so hard not to keep comparing this book to Fifty Shades when it’s so similar.  However, I will give the writing credit for being a lot more adult (i.e. no “inner goddess” or “holy Moses”).  There are hints that Eva and Gideon will enter into a D/s relationship in the next book, but this book contains very few BDSM elements.

If you want hot sex scenes with gorgeous people in them, Bared to You delivers.  The writing is pretty good, I just wish there was more to the plot and the characters.  I’m optimistic that the next book will explore the main characters in more depth.  The sequel is due out this October, and I’ll probably read it and review it in a future post, because I am curious to find out what happens!

***

Please, Sir: Erotic Stories of Female Submission by Rachel Kramer Bussel (2010)

If short stories are your thing, then this collection will definitely get you all hot and bothered!  Please, Sir contains twenty-two BDSM stories involving female submissives.  This is a very diverse collection that spans across the BDSM spectrum, from spanking and light bondage to choking, punishment, heavy bondage, and multiple partners.  While there is some hard play in some of these stories, there is also an aspect of love and caring depicted as well, which makes this book rather intriguing.

This is a very well-edited collection, with a pretty wide range of topics to suit a variety of tastes.  There were only one or two stories that didn’t appeal to me (one involved “water sports”…but hey, to each her own), but I definitely enjoyed the vast majority of them.  A few of my favorites were “Anticipation,” “Long Time Gone,” and “The Negotiation.”

Aside from being engaging and arousing, what’s also appealing about these stories is how all the characters are regular people.  No gorgeous billionaires or geniuses with perfect bodies here.  The characters in Please, Sir could be your friends, coworkers, or neighbors.  Reading this book might make you look at the people around you and wonder who among them has a secret kinky side!

***

Best Erotic Romance by Kristina Wright (2011)

If you’re in the mood for steamy sex but BDSM isn’t quite your cup of tea, then pick up this collection of hot short stories.  Trust me, it’s anything but vanilla!  From Cleis Press, the same company that published Please, Sir, this book offers passionate sex in a variety of fun situations.  The writers include Bared to You author Sylvia Day.

The main theme of this collection is romantic relationships.  The men and women in this book find themselves at different points in their relationships, and for them, sex and emotion are always connected.  ”First Night” tells the story of a couple’s wedding night, while in “Memories for Sale,” a couple wonders whether to end their marriage.  The couple in “What Happened in Vegas” decide to turn their off-and-on tryst into a long-term relationship, and in “Drive Me Crazy,” a manager and her subordinate decide to become more than just coworkers.

The sex is passionate, and the stories all portray loving couples in different kinds of relationships.  This collection is a great combination of romance and erotica, and is perfect for those who prefer more upbeat stories with happier endings.

***

SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman (1998)

OK, so this one isn’t fiction, but I have a good reason for adding it in here!  I keep hearing about how the resurgence in the erotica genre has led to a huge boost in sales of ropes, cable ties, and other things that can be used to spice up one’s sex life.  And while that’s totally awesome, what some may not realize is that there are certain techniques involved in using this “equipment,” and everyone should know how to play safely.

SM 101 is written by an active member of the BDSM lifestyle, and is a great guide for newbies who are interested in experimenting with different types of play.  It covers everything, from spanking (yes, there are different ways to spank ;) ) to bondage, clamps, knots, and any kinky thing you can think of.  It also covers safe words and contracts, and I’m willing to bet that EL James used this book as a reference for the Fifty Shades trilogy.

This book is extremely useful not only because it emphasizes safety, but because it tells you how to use toys and equipment in the most pleasurable way.  It could definitely use an update so that it’s more up to date with today’s technology  (it mentions payphones as opposed to cellphones for example), but it’s still a great book to get if you’re looking for bold new things to try with your significant other.  And it’s available for Kindle so no one has to know what you’re reading :)

My Big Kinky Erotica Post, Part One

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There are many books considered to be “erotic classics,” far too many to list all in one post.  These are the books still whispered about and passed among friends, the ones that have titillated readers for decades.  Maybe you’re heard of these books but never got around to reading them.  Maybe you noticed them tucked in your mom’s sock drawer years ago.  But since the resurgence of erotica in mainstream publishing, these classics are once again becoming popular.  So here is my take on some of the most popular titles in erotic literature.  Enjoy!

Story of O by Pauline Réage (1954)

The ultimate kinky classic!  How could I start this list with anything other than this scandalous BDSM masterpiece?  Originally published in France and later translated into English in 1965, Story of O is every bit the shocking and sinfully enjoyable book its reputation states.  Not so much for the sexual acts described in the book (although the sex is quite graphic), but for the psychology of the protagonist O.

Story of O is about a young Parisian fashion photographer who willfully surrenders herself to slavery and debasement at the hands of her lover René.  O lets René take her to a château in the country where she is used for the sexual gratification of him and three other men.  For two weeks she is routinely bound, flogged, and made to perform various sex acts on demand.  After her stay at the château, O’s journey into total submission continues when René gives her to his best friend and tells her “you belong to him now.”

The sex got my attention, but what held my interest was how the story delved into O’s psyche.  Because even more unsettling that the acts committed against O was her willingness to submit to them.  So desperate to please René was she that she let him use her in any way that he saw fit.  Even when he gave her to other men to beat and abuse, she derived happiness in the knowledge that she was obeying his wishes.  All she desired was reassurance that he still loved her, and she would be happy to endure anything he asked.  And indeed René did insist many times that he truly loved O.  But his love came with a price: absolute obedience, which she freely chose.  It’s a perverted sort of romance, but fascinating nonetheless.

So does Story of O stand the test of time?  Absolutely.  The language is pretty clunky at times (keep in mind it is a translated work) and some of the terms are a little archaic, but the themes it discusses are timeless.  Is there happiness in slavery?  Is total submission the ultimate expression of love?  It’s a heavy story with a ton of kink and even more substance.  Read it slowly, savor it, let it seduce you.  You won’t soon forget it.

***
A Sport and a Pastime by James Salter (1967)

Another erotic tale set in France!  Written by American author James Salter, A Sport and a Pastime is the story of an affair between a young American man and a French girl.

Philip Dean is a Yale dropout.  He’s handsome, charming, and privileged.  While vacationing in France, he begins an ill-fated affair with a local girl named Anne-Marie.  Together they travel around the French countryside, and their relationship intensifies as they find new ways to explore their sexuality.  The details of their physical relationship are graphic but not shocking, thanks to Salter’s beautiful and tasteful prose.

We soon see that the relationship isn’t picture-perfect.  When they’re not in bed together, Dean seems disenchanted by Anne-Marie.  He disdains her lack of pedigree, even thinking to himself that her pierced ears make her seem cheap.  He also resents her for being needy and clingy (at least by his perception), and often treats her coldly when they are in public together.

What’s most interesting about A Sport and a Pastime is that it is narrated by a third party who claims to be Dean’s friend.  The book takes on an unsettling voyeuristic aspect when the narrator describes Dean and Anne-Marie’s sexual acts, events he could not have actually witnessed.  Indeed, even the narrator admits that this story is partially his own fantasy of what Dean and Anne-Marie’s relationship was like.  The unreliable narrator adds a unique dimension to this short and sad tale.

While the reader may be wondering which details of the couple’s affair are true, there is one truth that shines through in this book: relationships based solely on sex rarely end well.  When Dean and Anne-Marie were in bed together, they were free and open in their passion for each other.  But in public, social pressures and class prejudices took their toll on the affair.

Some think that A Sport and a Pastime is outdated.  But while some of the language may be a little passé, I think the story itself is timeless.  The book is being republished as an ebook by Open Road Media, and will hopefully attract new readers.

***

Nine and a Half Weeks by Elizabeth McNeill (1978)

Written under a pseudonym, Nine and a Half Weeks is a first-person account of a New York woman’s two-month affair with a man she meets casually.  During this time, he comes to dominate every aspect of her life.  He feeds her, bathes her, dresses her, tells her what to do, and yes, he even inserts and removes her tampons for her.  No, I didn’t throw that in there to make sure you were paying attention.  Though the woman’s lover also uses light bondage and corporal punishment on her, the main focus of the book is his emotional dominance over her as opposed to their sexual practices.

In terms of kink, Nine and a Half Weeks is pretty tame in comparison to Story of O.  This book’s controversy lies not in its sexual content, but in its protagonist’s willingness to surrender all her autonomy to her lover.  She writes how adulthood is a burden to her, and what a relief it is for her to let her lover make all her decisions for her, even when it comes to simple things like choosing clothes.  In the 1970s, when feminism was in full swing in the US, this is a bold statement to make.

It’s an interesting book, but for me, Nine and a Half Weeks didn’t have the substance that Story of O  or A Sport and a Pastime had.  It wasn’t quite as deep, I wasn’t drawn to the character in the same way I was drawn to O, and I found the writing style to be pretty flat.  Still, it’s an erotic classic, and worth reading as such.

***

Little Birds by Anaïs Nin (1979)

File:Little Birds Nin.jpg

For those of you looking for short erotic stories, look no further!  Anaïs Nin has long been considered one of the masters of erotic literature, and this volume showcases the sensuality and beauty of her writing.

The thirteen stories in Little Birds deal with a range of sex-related topics, including virginity, sexual passivity/dominance, lesbianism, and even pedophilia.  Many of the women in these stories find themselves experimenting with new sexual experiences and learning to open themselves up to their own desires.  One of my favorites was “The Maja,” in which a seemingly prudish woman discovers her sensual side after she discovers her artist husband has been secretly making nude paintings of her.

The writing style of Little Birds is beautiful in its simplicity, and the stories are a lot deeper than you would think at first glance.  It’s a short volume, but not one to be read through quickly.  Perfect for those who prefer softer erotica, and a great way to introduce yourself to the writing of Anaïs Nin!

***

I hope you get a chance to check out these old classics.  Maybe they will become your new favorites.  Or are you looking for something a little more modern?  Stay tuned for the follow-up to this post, where I talk about some newer erotic titles!

Early Review: The Siren

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The Siren by Tiffany Reisz (pub date 7/24/12)

I’ve never reviewed a Harlequin book before, but I figured it might be good to branch off to other genres.  Plus I could use a little light reading this week!  I heard about this book through NetGalley and seeing that it seemed similar to Fifty Shades, I thought I would give it a try.

The Siren is the first installment of a new romance/erotica trilogy called “The Original Sinners.”  One review quoted on Amazon said this book is as dangerous and subversive as Fight Club.  Um, not really, and let’s not get carried away, shall we?  Still, this book was a decent erotica story, short and sweet, and pretty fun to read.

In The Siren, thirty-something erotica author Nora Sutherlin is working on her fifth novel, and is on the verge of securing a deal with a new publisher, Royal House.  This deal will make or break her career, and she wants to work with Royal House’s best editor.  Enter Zach Easton, an editor with a reputation for being demanding and controlling, and who is anything but excited to work with a “trashy” writer like Nora.  Though reluctant at first, Zach finds Nora’s quirks (like living with a teenage boy) oddly appealing, and agrees to work with her on the condition that she rewrite her entire manuscript to his satisfaction.

This manuscript turns out to be more personal than anything Nora has ever written before.  It’s her way of expressing her confusion and guilt about love and her past relationships.  She reveals to Zach that she still has feelings for her ex-lover Søren, with whom she had a long-term D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationship.  Zach, still hurting after his wife left him, soon starts to wonder if he has feelings for Nora.  Unable to resist her charms, Zach allows Nora to introduce him to the secret world of BDSM, and finds himself taking on more than he thought.

Though not as steamy as Fifty Shades in the bed department, this book has an OK story and some pretty fun sex scenes.  The “book within a book” format was a little distracting at times, but for the most part it was effective at conveying Nora’s character traits.  The main plot revolves around a typical love triangle, or in this case, a love quadrangle.  What I did enjoy most about this book is that it explores the psychology of the BDSM lifestyle and the D/s relationship, something that Fifty Shades quickly glossed over.  Nora’s character is decently developed, but most of the other main characters didn’t blow me away.  Honestly I thought that Søren was the most interesting character in the whole story, but I can’t say why without giving too much away.  The complexity of both his character and his relationship with Nora was the best thing about this book.

The second book in the trilogy, The Angel, is due out in September 2012, and I certainly hope that Søren is featured more in it.  It would give me an excuse to keep using that awesome little ‘ø’ symbol.

Since reading the Fifty Shades trilogy and The Siren, I’ve become more interested in reading other erotica titles and doing a giant post on which ones I enjoyed the most.  So stay tuned for more kinky fuckery ahead!

Book Review: NightWhere

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NightWhere by John Everson (Kindle edition 6/5/12, paperback 10/2/12)

“Are you the harvester, or the harvest?”
A little sexual experimentation is fine, but the wrong kind can get you killed…or worse.  For the young couple in John Everson’s erotic horror novel NightWhere, the world of pleasure mixed with pain proves to be both enticing and dangerous.
Mark and Rae have been enjoying the swinging scene for a few years.  Though Mark is less excited by it than Rae is, he is happy to give his wife the freedom she needs because he knows she will always come home to him.  When the couple receive an invitation to the exclusive underground sex club NightWhere, Rae is awash with excitement.  Though curious, Mark agrees to go more to keep an eye on his wife than to hook up.
On the surface, NightWhere seems to be just a BDSM club.  Mark and Rae are welcomed to “go in and sin,” and both quickly find themselves enjoying what the club as to offer.  But after a few more visits to the mysterious club, Mark notices a drastic change in his free-spirited wife.  Rae becomes obsessed with pain, both giving and receiving it.  At NightWhere she gets to indulge her secret fantasies with real whips and chains, and her bloodlust earns her an invitation into an even more exclusive part of the club simply known as The Red.  In The Red, the pain and degradation are more intense, and more addictive.
When Rae doesn’t come home one night, Mark discovers that she has been to NightWhere without him, and he faces the unthinkable in order to bring her back.  What horror would you endure to save someone you love?
Woah.  For once I’m speechless.  Simply put, this book is disturbing.  Even if you enjoy horror, this book might be tough for you to get through.  NightWhere is not a sex club where couples go to play with trick handcuffs and silk blindfolds.  It’s more like a sex club run by the cast of Hellraiser.  When you play at NightWhere, you play for keeps.  The book’s content is brutal and extremely graphic, and the pain dealt is both physical and emotional.  This is not a romance, and it makes Fifty Shades look like Fun With Dick and Jane.
But make no mistake, I thoroughly enjoyed this book.  When you look past the gory content, you will see this book has substance.  NightWhere has all the themes I love in a good story: good v. evil, sin and redemption, and (believe it or not) love.  Mark’s love for Rae is pure, and it causes him to risk everything to try and save her.  Rae’s love for Mark is empty, and she seeks to fill the void within her with pain and acceptance by the people of NightWhere.  As Rae falls deeper under the seductive power of The Red, she struggles with the last remaining traces of her humanity.  There’s a lot to this book that make it more than a typical “torture porn.”
This is the third John Everson book I’ve read.  Last year I read (and loved) The Pumpkin Man and Siren.  And like these other novels, NightWhere combines reality with supernatural elements and creates a truly scary and unforgettable story.  If you’re anything like me, it’ll freak you out, but it’ll also make you come back to find out what happens next.  If you’re a horror fan and you can handle more graphic content, definitely read this book.  But afterward if you find a red invitation slipped under your door, do yourself a favor and don’t open it!

Finally ‘Freed’

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It seems that most of the American public (myself included, *blushes*) just can’t get enough of the Fifty Shades trilogy.  From a Saturday Night Live parody to constant speculation about the alleged film adaptation to author EL James’ highly successful book tour, Fifty Shades is continuously in the headlines.  Stirring the controvery surrounding the books is the fact that a Florida county banned the books from its public libraries citing its “perceived pornographic nature.”  Because Heaven forbid that a book portray a woman enjoying sex.  I guess women don’t have sex in Florida.  But my mom lives in Florida and I sent her a copy of Fifty Shades for Mothers Day, so take that, rednecks!

Having just finished the third book, Fifty Shades Freed, I can see overall why the trilogy may be considered a little controversial, but in the end I think the books are fun and will do more good than harm.  Anything that encourages women to enrich their sexuality and to tell their partners what they want in bed is ok by me…and I know that my own husband has had no complaints about me reading the books ;)

Some have argued that the books are anti-feminist, in that they portray a woman desperate to please her man, trying things she’s uncomfortable with just to keep his interest.  Come on, really?  I definitely believe in equality between the sexes and all that good stuff, but I don’t think these books are anti-feminist.  Ana might be a little bit of a twit at times, but whereas Christian was used to dominating women, Ana is the first woman he’s encountered who dared to push back.  After all, she never did sign his sex contract.  In her own way, she started to stand up to him and question his demands, and that’s what really got his attention and (more importantly) his respect.  I think what the books really show is that a woman can submit in the bedroom and still be her husband’s equal.  Personally I think that’s the best of both worlds.

**[SPOILERS]**

While Freed was fun to read and just as kinky as the first two books, it was definitely the weakest of the trilogy.  There were too many subplots that got wrapped up way too quickly, and I really did not care for Ana and Christian becoming parents at the end.  Like I said in my post about Fifty Shades Darker, I want my smut to be smutty, and settling down and having a brood ruins the fantasy for me.  It’s a tidy way to wrap up the story (“happily ever after” and all that jazz), but I think it would be bold and refreshing if just once a literary couple would choose to be childfree.  But I digress…

I’d like to close this post by finally sharing some pics from the EL James signing in Philadelphia on May 3.  I blew off work and spent the day in the city, and got to meet Ms. James and some pretty interesting people in the process.  Two women I spoke to had driven overnight all the way from Ontario.  Suddenly my hour train ride didn’t seem so bad.  If you follow me on Twitter then you may have already seen these, but if you don’t follow me (@ChicksDigBooks), scroll down and enjoy!  Sorry for the not-so-great quality of some of the pics; someone else took my camera and we weren’t allowed to actually pose for photos with Ms. James.

Me just moments before the signing! The lovely Canadians were nice enough to take a picture for me.

She’s here!

 

 

 

 

We meet at last…

 

Yup, she signed it “Laters, baby”!

 

Thanks for reading, everyone, and I’ll see you at the Fifty Shades movie!

‘Darker’ I Go!

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Since I admit that I enjoyed the first one (probably more than I should have), last week I decided to go ahead and read the second installment of the Fifty Shades trilogy, Fifty Shades Darker.  Someone gave me an Amazon gift card for my birthday, so I really had nothing to lose.  I wanted to see if the story was worth continuing and also what other crazy hijinks America’s most delightfully perverted couple can get into.  So here we go:

**[SPOILERS: They have sex]**

After Ana dumped Christian at the end of the first book, she spends all of the first chapter of the second book feeling sorry for herself and trying to move on with her life.  By the end of the second chapter, she and Christian are back together.  So much for moving on.  Not able to endure the agony of their eight minute breakup, Christian begs Ana to take him back and promises to curb his BDSM-related desires in order to be in a “vanilla” relationship with her.

Even though Christian promises no hardcore stuff, Darker still delivers all kinds of “kinky fuckery,” in which Ana and Christian express their renewed feelings for each other by having sex on a boat, a billiard table, a coffee table, a grand piano, in an elevator, in his childhood bedroom, and I think in a bed.  To shake things up, the book goes all Lifetime Movie and throws in a psycho ex-girlfriend and some sexual harassment by Ana’s new boss.

Despite all my common sense telling me I should hate this book, I had the same dumb smile on my face while reading it that I did when I read the first book.  For the brutally hot sex scenes, I was willing to forgive the lame dialogue and barely-there plot.  I was even willing to overlook the return of the annoying e-mails and the much-hated “inner goddess.”  However, some of the dialogue was just so cheesy it was awesome.  Among my personal favorites were Christian’s lines “I don’t know whether to worship at your feet or spank the shit out of you,” and “Why, why do you defy me?” 

**[REAL SPOILERS]**

One thing that perturbed me about Darker however, aside from the awkward ice cream scene, was Ana and Christian getting engaged.  Not because of the fact that they have only known each other for a few weeks, but because it ruins the spirit of the books.  I don’t want to read about two people getting married…I am married.  These books are about fantasy and about exploring taboo subjects in a fun and safe way, so having Ana and Christian get married is just so…blah.  Their tempestuous, sometimes dangerous relationship and Christian’s mysterious persona are what made the first book fun and exciting.  But now he’s supposedly cured of his dark impulses, and so they’re engaged and he bought her a ring and a huge house and of course she’s quickly developing a case of Baby Rabies.  *sigh*  It’s great to want those things in real life, but in a story that’s supposed to be dark and erotic, those things just kill the mood. 

Of course I’m not criticizing marriage as an institution (I am married, remember), and I’m certainly not saying that married couples can’t experiment with or enjoy a BDSM lifestyle.  I’m just saying that in terms of pure escapism and erotic fantasy, the “happily ever after” has got to go.

Granted, I haven’t yet read the third book in the trilogy, so I don’t know what happens next.  But deep down inside I’m hoping just a little bit for Christian to get cold feet, or for another psycho ex to ruin their wedding.  Because I don’t want Ana and Christian to be happy.  I want them to be tortured and confused.  Why?  Because they’re not real people!  I’m real, and reality is boring.  Domestic bliss has no place in this story.  I want my smut to be smutty; I don’t want my favorite friends with benefits falling in love and picking out china patterns.  So while I am still (ashamedly) eager to read the next and last Fifty Shades book, I’ll be sorely disappointed if it turns out to be five hundred pages of “I love you” and the two of them exchanging innuendos while doing the dishes.

Laters, baby!

Fifty Shades of ‘The Room’

New Release Reviews, , , , , ,

Two weeks ago I was in Barnes & Noble, (almost) minding my own business, when I observed a middle-aged woman excitedly approach a store clerk and ask if he had Fifty Shades of Grey in stock.  When the clerk explained that it was currently still only available as an e-book, the woman rushed to the front of the store and bought a Nook.  It has to be said that what I witnessed was a miracle of modern marketing.  Impressed by the fact that this woman was willing to spend over $100 on an e-reader just to read this book rather than wait four days for it to be released in much cheaper paperback, I decided to give in and find out what all the fuss was for.  So here goes:

 

**[NOTE: By now the whole world pretty much knows what the plot is, but if you're not sure, look it up on Amazon or B&N.com.  The customer reviews alone are worth reading!]**

I had heard it compared to Twilight before I read it, but it wasn’t until after I started reading Fifty Shades that my friend and fellow book blogger told me that it was actually written as a Twilight fanfic.  *sigh*  And except for the sex of course (and the fact that Christian Grey is more like Patrick Bateman than Edward Cullen), Fifty Shades is pretty much just like Twilight in terms of characterization: she’s bumbling and awkward, he’s cold and distant, and both are equally annoying.  The story is forced at best and the dialogue is atrocious.  I rolled my eyes so many times during the first two chapters I thought I would lose a contact lens. 

But still, I couldn’t help but notice a certain level of enjoyment that I experienced in reading this book.  Every time I tried to tell my husband about how stupid it is, he countered with “Oh yeah, then why are you smiling?”  And he was right.  As silly as it is, I was enjoying it, and I was looking forward to lunch breaks and coming home from work to read more of it.  Sure, the sex is hot, but the rest of it is just ridiculous.  So what gives?

Then I realized that perhaps the reason I enjoyed Fifty Shades is because it reminds me of my all-time favorite bad movie The Room.  If you’ve never heard of The Room, you need to Netflix it right now!  It has to be one of the worst movies ever made, yet I have watched it so many times I have it memorized.  I find such exquisite joy in watching this terrible movie that it’s almost criminal.  And for me, Fifty Shades has a lot of the same elements as The Room: under developed characters, repetitive and laughable dialogue, sex scenes that come out of nowhere, contradictions, and characters who enter a scene just to leave it again two seconds later.  What’s not to love?

I’ll give credit where it’s due: the sex scenes are hot, and it is a remarkable feat that this story started out as a simple online fanfic and achieved so much success in such a short time.  But basically, Fifty Shades is just a fun erotic story that perpetuates the cherished but unfortunate  myth that the “bad boy” can be changed.  “Oh, he told me he doesn’t want a relationship and that he’s had fifteen women before me and that he doesn’t love me, but I can change him!”  *sigh*  Ana’s inner monologue is just annoying (What 21-year-old says ”holy moses”?!), and all that “inner goddess” and “my sex” (just say vagina!) stuff made me want to scream.  But I admit that I enjoyed it for how silly it is, and yeah, ok, I bought the sequel.  And I’m sure I’ll have a big dumb grin on my face when I read that too.

Want more Fifty Shades goodness?  Check out what my BFF Jenn N. at the Booksellers Without Borders blog had to say about it!